Emotions tends to play a vital role in the life of the human beings. Love emotions tend to being two heart closer while anger tends to depart you from your loved ones. Though anger is normal emotion and healthy sometimes. However, it becomes quite unhealthy if it is likely to flare up all the time or spirals out of control. Chronic, explosive anger tends to have serious consequences not only in your relationships and your health but also in your state of mind. Getting anger under control my not be easier for you but here are some anger management tips to remember if you want to control your anger.
1. Think before you speak
In any heating argument, it is easy to say anything but for that words only you are likely to regret later. Therefore, you should take a few moments so that you are able to collect your thoughts before saying anything. You should also allow others involved in the situation to do the same. Thus, it will help not only you but also others to manage their anger.
2. Express your anger when you are calm
The sooner you started to think clearly then only express your frustration in an assertive but in a non-confrontational way. You should state your concerns and needs clearly and directly, without hurting others or trying to control your anger.
3. Get some exercise
Physical activity not only helps to keep your body fit but also helps you to reduce stress which is the main cause off anger. If you feel your anger escalating, go for a brisk walk or run, or spend some time doing other enjoyable physical activities.
4. Take a timeout
Timeouts are not only just for kids but also you need to give yourself short breaks during those times of the day that tend to be stressful. A few moments of quiet time might help you feel better and also make you prepare to handle what is ahead without getting irritated or angry.
5. Try to find out possible solutions
You should not focus on what made you mad but you should work on resolving the issue at hand. Ask yourself certain questions such as "Does your child's messy room drive you crazy? Is your partner late for dinner every night? Or what is the reason for your anger?" If your answer to all this question is "yes" then you can simply close the door of your child so that messy room is not visible to you or you can even schedule meals later in the evening. You should try to find the answer of your anger and try to work on it. You should keep in mind that anger would not help you to fix anything and might only make it worse.
6. Stick with 'I' statements
In order to avoid criticizing or placing blame which is the only source to increase tension, you should use "I" statements to describe the problem. You should be respectful and specific. For example, say, "I am upset that you left the table without offering to help with the dishes" instead of "You never do any housework."
7. Avoid holding a grudge
You must keep in mind that forgiveness is a powerful tool. If you allow anger and other negative feelings to crowd out positive feelings, you might find yourself swallowed up by your own bitterness or sense of injustice. But if you are able to forgive someone who angered you then you might learn from the situation and strengthen your relationship.
8. Humor helps to release anger
In order to release anger you can lighten up yourself. You should use humor to help you to face what is making you angry and if possible try to give up to the thoughts of any unrealistic expectations you have for how things should go. You must try to avoid this sarcasm as it can hurt feelings and make things get worst.
9. Practice relaxation skills
When your temper is likely to flare up you should try to put relaxation skills to work. You must practice deep-breathing exercises, imagine a relaxing scene, or repeat a calming word or phrase, such as "Take it easy." You can even listen to music, write in a journal or do a few yoga poses. You can do whatever it takes to encourage relaxation.
10. Know when to seek help
If you are learning to control anger then it is a challenge for everyone at times. You should seek help for anger issues if your anger seems out of control and is likely to cause you to do things you regret or hurts those around you.
11. Count to 100
This one seems pretty basic, but it works. You should try to think about something other than what is making you upset. You must count for 100 seconds and it will help you to avoid blowing a fuse. It will give you a chance to gather yourself and your thoughts before you do anything else.
12. Write it down
Sometimes, it is seen that writing stuff down can help you to work out. Why are you feeling angry and how you might be able to deal with it? You can even scribble, doodle or sketch your thoughts or feelings. It will also help you to put things in perspective and you would be able to control and manage your anger.
13. Distract yourself
If you find yourself stewing about something and just cannot seem to let it go. Then you can help yourself by doing something that will get your mind past what was bugging you. If you want you can watch TV, read, or go to the movies.
Lastly, it would be better for you if you are able to use suggestions such as these then you are likely to get less angry and thus avoid affecting your health. You will also have less chances of moving toward aggressive behavior.